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Want a romantic getaway but still need to take the kids? What do you do when he’s not in the mood? Sexpert Jennifer Berman answers your questions.

Smiling family enjoying in the pool.

Q: My husband and I would like our family beach trip to double as a romantic escape. Got any tips for sneaking sexiness into a family vacation?

A: Floaties, zinc oxide, and hours at the kiddie pool don’t scream romance. But trust me—with the right planning, it can happen. Pick a destination that will help you keep the kids happy, fed, and busy. In most cases, this means opting for an inclusive resort rather than booking a beach house of your own, unless you plan to bring along a sitter. I tell women to look for resorts that provide child care (and ideally, suites, so you and he have a bedroom door to close). The more activities offered for the children, the more free time you two will have to steal away for a little one-on-one. Take advantage of the outdoor activities the resort offers for adults, too. Work up a sweat together; it’s an excellent aphrodisiac. (See Three Easy Ways to Get in the Mood—Fast!) Or book a couple’s massage in the spa. Definitely hire a sitter once or twice, so you can treat yourselves to a romantic dinner and take a leisurely evening stroll on the beach. Nothing beats coming back to a clean room with the kids asleep and both of you intoxicated by the smell of the sea.

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