We really weren’t kidding when we told you to burn your satin sheets. Just like dressing well is considered good manners, the same goes for interiors- and inviting someone into a bedroom that even a pig wouldn’t consider renting out is like a social slap in the face. While we’re not saying these do’s and don’ts will help you get lucky, finally calling a priest for that pile of dirty laundry beneath the bed always helps your chances.
Your life might be a mess, but your bedroom doesn’t have to be
The first and best course of action to take is to totally de-clutter your bedroom. Old magazines? Out. Old email print outs? Out. Your swimming certificates from eight grade? A national treasure to be protected at all costs.
Change the sheets (And not just flip them over,ugh)
This one is a no brainer, but we’ll say it again just in case- there’s nothing more seductive than a crisp set of sheets to slide into after a shower. Did you know the average single male changes his sheets just 4 a times a year? Avoid unexpected ambush and change them every week or so- or just about the time when the crumbs and other gross things in your sheets have banded together to form a mutiny against you.
Stack a crap-ton of books
Reading is sexy, so having a ton of books that imply that you read still counts, right? It’s time to put all your dog-eared Wilbur Smiths and Grishams into one place and put them up for display for the world to see. If anyone is ever curious enough to ask about your favourite, it’s time to shake that head again.
Try putting up some artists that you know nothing about
You know it’s fine art if you haven’t the foggiest idea of what’s going on. Impress your friends and lie to yourself by picking up some prints of names you’ve never heard before. If anyone ever asks you about your new investment, get teary eyed, shake your head and say ‘it’s just so beautiful’. Picasso would be proud. Or not.